The Bride with White Hair II
" It's simplistic in the worst way, the small amount of action there is is in blurry pseudo-slow motion, and aside from Brigitte Lin's commanding screen presence, there's nothing here to hold your interest unless it's simple eye candy you're looking for."
The Bride with White Hair II (1993)
Director: David Wu Dai-Wai
Producer: Ronny Yu Yan Taai, Clifton Ko Chi-Sum
Writer: Ronny Yu Yan Taai, David Wu Dai-Wai, Raymond To Kwok-Wai
Cast: Leslie Cheung Kwok-Wing, Brigitte Lin Ching-Hsia, Sunny Chan Kam Hung, Christy Cheun Lai-Tai, Joey Man Yee-Man, Lily Chung Suk Wai, Suen Gwok Ho, Tiu Gwan Mei, Lee Heung Kam, Chui Jun Fung
Running Time: 80 min.
Plot: The Bride With White Hair saga continues with the bloody massacre of the followers of the Eight Clans. Powerful, insane and obsessed with hatred, the Bride (Ching-hsia) can only be stopped by the one person she loves (Cheung).
NUMSKULL'S REVIEW: Good Lord. This is bloody awful. I wasn't too fond of the first one, but at least it had some heart. The story didn't just follow a straight line from Point A to Point B with a quick stop at Point C to use the restroom. The same cannot be said of the sequel. It's almost like a Walt Disney movie, except for all the blood, death, and nipples.
Brigitte Lin is pissed off at her lover from the first movie, so she uses her hair to kill every man in sight. Representatives from the EIght Big Clans get together to try to stop her. One of them has a wife who's been kidnapped and brainwashed by Brigitte's followers.
Oh, who the fuck cares? This movie could have been written by third graders. It reminds me of a bad anime film inspired by that overblown dog pile Naked Killer, at least in some ways. It's simplistic in the worst way, the small amount of action there is is in blurry pseudo-slow motion, and aside from Brigitte Lin's commanding screen presence, there's nothing here to hold your interest unless it's simple eye candy you're looking for. It has none of its predecessor's charm or complexity (and remember, I didn't much care for THAT one, either). If you see this one on a shelf and you have a chance to watch it, do yourself a favor and pass it by. Better yet, if you see this one on a shelf and you think you can get away with it, do the world a favor and toss it in a wood chipper or some similar device. Those things aren't just for dead bodies, you know.
NUMSKULL'S RATING: 2/10