"I bought this, but, now, I will be disposing of it by the most efficient way possible, by eating it."

- limeyninja

Clementine (2004)

Director: Kim Du-Yeong

Writers: Eun Hye-rim

Cast: Dong-jun Lee, Steven Seagal, Hye-ri Kim, Seo-woo Eun, Ju-bong Gi, Ho Lim, Hyeok-pil Lim

Running Time: 100 min.

Plot: See Limeyninja's review below.


LIMEYNINJA'S REVIEW: After much anticipation, I finally watched Clementine. Unfortunately, even expecting the worst for this film, I was horribly disappointed.

Lee Dong-jun plays Kim Seung-Hyun, the Tae Kwon Do champion of the world, who unfairly losses to an American opponent while visiting the US. In despair, he turns to Cage fighting in Las Vegas for the next year (which unfortunately we barely see, only a few freeze frames of him and Seagal).

During this time his wife gives birth to a daughter, Sa-Rang, dieing in the process. Eventually Seung-Hyun returns to Korea, becomes a police officer and raises Sa-Rang by himself.

And that is what most of the film is. A single father raising his daughter. Yes, the father is a Tae Kwon Do Champion, then a Cop, and then he is forced to turn to cage fighting again, but that is all in the background. It's about a father and daughter, and eventually a wife, struggling to be together, as we find that she didn't die after all. It was just a ruse by her mother.

Yes, Steven Seagal is in this film, but, I think it was a horrid mistake on the filmmakers part to cast him, mostly because he is in the film for literaly 5 minutes. People going to see Seagal in this film, or see Seagal fight, will leave the film in shock. Seung-Hyun is blackmailed into fighting him, the world cage fighting champion, after some nasty Americans, the leader of which is played by Kevin Grevioux from Underworld, kidnap Sa-Rang. He has to fall in the 3rd round. Fortunately, his ex-wife, who he thought was dead, is a cop/lawyer and she comes to America and rescues her, just in time for Seung-Hyun to fight Seagal.

But, again, unfortunately, it disappoints. The fight lasts about a minute, and cuts away with out showing any winner. Seagal gets hit a few times, for once, but what is most disappointing is that we find out he loses, but you never get to see it.

But the kicker of the film is, after it's all over, Seagal comes to the hospital Seung-Hyun is at and gives him his world cage fighting champion belt, and confesses he never knew about the kidnapping, and that he is just a nice guy. Seung-Hyun tells him he is gentleman and they shake hands. So, Seagal is still a good guy. Damn it.

So, if you want to see a movie about how important it is to be there for you kids, and how you should keep your family together at all costs, then watch this film. If you want to see a film about cage fighting featuring Steven Seagal, then please, don't watch this. I bought this, but, now, I will be disposing of it by the most efficient way possible, by eating it.